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The Death of Me

by Sad Sack of Shit

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1.
Lonely Tree 01:50
I'm lonely, feel like a tree far far away from all it's buddies I'm lonely, feel like a tree far far away from all it's buddies I'm sorry about the times that I hurt you and nowadays all I can do is miss you sitting around, so deathly alone and now I'm scared of my telephone I'm lonely, feel like a tree far far away from all it's buddies I'm lonely, feel like a tree far far away from all it's buddies
2.
Medicated 03:48
I had to force myself to cry Since I stopped wanting to die Get these pills outta my life but I'll start wanting to die Emotions are not allowed now that I'm done with the cloud the thing that plagued my brain I thought would be there till my wake A life long illness that seemed to create my entire fucking personality Has been removed, stripped from me leaving me feeling a shell three times a day to feel okay open the bottle, pop one in won't destroy my loneliness I feel like a lying lion I had to force myself to cry Since I stopped wanting to die Get these pills outta my life but I'll start wanting to die I'm in hell, not in hell, oh what the hell what kind of dimension really exists With this intrinsic amount of carelessness I am a beacon, a rouge, a smell
3.
Love, love, is all that matters Love, oh love is all that I care Love is the light it's the light of this world and I'm done with that sad sack life I love my Cat (she loves her cat) and I love my mom! (she loves her mom) and I love my grandma and my uncle and my aunt! I'm done with that prison I built for myself Because I love the world and everything else Sad sack of shit is dead and gone they jumped off a bridge while singing a song And replaced with me, a beacon of love don't care how you like it, it's dead and gone Love, love, is all that matters Love, oh love is all that I care Love is the light it's the light of this world and I'm done with that sad sack life I love myself (she loves herself) and I love my body (she loves her body) and I love my mind and my skills and the way I spend my time! Love, love, is all that matters Love, oh love is all that I care Love is the light it's the light of this world and I'm done with that sad sack life They had a good run but they're dead and gone
4.
Feminize Me 02:33
I pay way too much attention to the lines on the street I can feel them when I'm walking, feel under my feet But I keep walking, never stopping, giving up is not an option Used to treat this life so bad but now I see it's not toxic We need to live it before we die otherwise you'll see me cry Like a lotus, I have bloomed, now that I am not a guy Femininity makes me happy, it's a new and lovely hell Dress this body up to shine, some days I can call quite swell We are all just moving parts in a world and made of cells So for the love of fucking everything, please just please be yourself Love is hard, so is life, you might die but that's alright Live it now, you know how, even if you're up all night
5.
Some days are hard, but it gets better my friend some days hold pain, an unbearable end some days last way too long for my liking some days are just downright frightening some days I just wanna stop but please don't stop, just let love guide you please don't worry, hold hope in the future please don't cry, unless you really need to I promise this hell will conclude Keep your chin up fighter, you will make us proud please don't worry now, you are safe and sound I don't wanna see you, in that deep dark hole I promise this hell will conclude Some days are hard, but it gets better my friend some days hold pain, an unbearable end some days last way too fucking long for my liking some days are just downright frightening some days I just wanna stop But please don't stop just let love guide you
6.
it's a wondrous and mystical path we have ahead To be filled with joy and glee till the day I'm dead and of course sometimes it will get worse but that's fine I will stride, and persevere, I will straighten my line Who you are, what you look like, it doesn't matter man just do your best to live your life as you are and as you can and if you want some help changing then I can offer my hand I'm excited to subscribe to these feelings of change got some new friends, love the old, no need for resentment I can help, but it will likely get better as we age I'll be happy, I'll be helpful regardless of prescription Who you are, what you look like, it doesn't matter man just do your best to live your life as you are and as you can and if you want some help changing then I can offer my hand
7.
This Planet 07:21
Existence is really hard sometimes Knowing we're all gonna die But your life doesn't have to be miserable don't take this planet alone don't make this planet your home because it's all going to be dead soon I take this planet for granted, granted I cannot stand it Standing on the granite while eating a pomegranate This earth is a hearse traveling the universe You’re worth, your birth, all meaningless nothingness Existence is really hard sometimes Knowing we're all gonna die But your life doesn't have to be miserable don't take this planet alone don't make this planet your home because it's all going to be dead soon I take this planet for granted, granted I cannot stand it Standing on the granite while eating a pomegranate This earth is a hearse traveling the universe You’re worth, your birth, all meaningless nothingness don't hold on too tight to things that you will lose unless you want to make yourself look like a gigantic fool don't let people hold you back, it's your goddamn life just be sure to consider them unless you want to cause strife the overwhelming weight of everything is horrible But sometimes friends and shit like that make it bearable Honestly, I could take this planet or leave it But certain people on the earth make me glad to be on it
8.
Imagine a world, free of touch, free of most things, free of emotion That’s impossible I know, that’s impossible I know Feeling sad about the inevitable, about the destructive nature of our universe If there’s a point I don’t know, if there’s a point I don’t know Living a lie is like living your life, screaming at the stars, why won’t I just die I don’t know, no I just don’t know SIgned away her life and now she cries, keep your spirit up, you can fight it now They took a good soul, why? I don’t know Imagine a world, free of touch, free of most things, free of emotion That’s impossible I know, that’s impossible I know Feeling sad about the inevitable, about the destructive nature of our universe If there’s a point I don’t know, if there’s a point I don’t know Living a lie is like living your life, screaming at the stars, why won’t I just die I don’t know, no I just don’t know SIgned away her life and now she cries, keep your spirit up, you can fight it now They took a good soul, why? I don’t know I’m the observer, as I cry, I really don’t want to say goodbye Why should I have to? I don’t know
9.
Hey, man, your anger must be tamed, you won’t get anywhere with that flame Destroying lives is not so fun when you’re the one having it done And now the purpose is so far gone, inconsistent ramblings have not won You’re out of luck here, please just leave, it’s about time that you flee Hold the gate, lock the doors Test your luck somewhere far Be gone from here, you retched scum Your trauma will be undone Can’t shake this soul, can’t break this life No matter how hard you can try I will avast and I will deny And protect this life I have built Trying to ruin a little girls dreams, hey now, that’s quite mean You can’t frighten me, or wreck me at my seams I am strong enough to fend off this evil, I am the church and I am the steeple Your curse has been undone, never to last again here Hold the gate, lock the doors Test your luck somewhere far Be gone from here, you retched scum Your trauma will be undone Can’t shake this soul, can’t break this life No matter how hard you can try I will avast and I will deny And protect this life I have built
10.
Everything is fine thanks to aripiprazole and buspirone Everything’s alright thanks to aripiprazole and buspirone
11.
what is life? how's it hard? and what do we know? what do we know what do we know? reality is nothing more than a feverish game a feverish game a devilish game and when I feel like missing you it won't leave my mind no it won't leave my mind, it just won’t leave my mind the chemicals inside are tearing my life, they're ripping my mind, they're fucking my life and please my friend I beg you so don't leave me confined, don't make me say goodbye, I can't say goodbye everything's a little meaningless but you are alive, and so am I, so am I death is not the point of life when I found it in you, yes it is true, I swear that it's true chemical imbalances lead to feelings of shame, guilty and deranged, sad and estranged I wish I cared a little bit less but I can't do you like that, I'm just a doormat, I'm just a doormat the cells in my body all deeply construed, all deeply conclude, that I do love you I can’t shake this feeling no matter how hard, no matter what I consume, no matter what I do but please my friend I beg you so don't leave me confined, don't make me say goodbye, I can't say goodbye what is life? how's it hard? and what do we know? what do we know what do we know? reality is nothing more than a feverish game a feverish game a devilish game and when I feel like missing you it won't leave my no it won't leave my mind, it just won’t leave my mind the chemicals inside are tearing my life, they're ripping my mind, they're fucking my life
12.
13.
I miss my old friends a lot but they're never coming back to reunite with me I miss my old self sometimes, but it's always too confined to act that way again I miss the old landscapes, the things I now rarely ever get to see This isn't the end, this isn't goodbye, just another stepping stone

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released June 28, 2021

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Sad Sack of Shit Albuquerque, New Mexico

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(Crimson Cats)

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